BTS: Are we part of the problem or the solution; dealing with grudges, anger and disturbances-Part - 2

Posted by dinesh

When the drunkard ran into our car that day, if I had been a dullard,
I might have thought, "Im the spiritual maser and am busy with
service, but now this wretched soul has bumped into our car. Rather we
just leave him on the side of the road since we are so busy with our
important preaching work." When we get too caught up in our
obligations, even if we have a chance to do what is Krishna conscious,
we may be too distracted. In one of my Beggar books, I wrote a prayer
describing how we can sometimes be so busy serving the spiritual
master that we have no time to serve the spiritual master. We are so
busy with our idea of serving Krishna that we have no time to really
serve Krishna. We are busy dovetailing, trying to do what we want to
do for Krishna, and then we propose to Him, "Krishna, just accept this
offering." There are so many subtle things we have to be aware of. Its
a matter of our consciousness. Are we angry at that devotee or are we
sad that that devoteee is hurting themselves? Are we angry at that
person, or are we disturbed because that person is cheating
themselves? If we are angry at them, then there is something lacking
in our depth of understanding. If we are oblivious and just do not
care, then there is also something wrong with us because we are
reinforcing deviant activities. We should be concerned because that
person is hurting themselves, and they can hurt others when other
people start following their bad example. There is a difference
between that kind of disturbance created by anger and holding a
grudge. The presence of a grudge or anger means that I am going to
create an obstacle. I am going to create a way to make life more
miserable for others. Bhakti Tirtha Swami, Reflections on Sacred
Teachings, Vol 6, Radha Sunya: Missing Mercy, Ch 1, Page 39-43