Bhakti is for Krishna's pleasure
May 2, 1974
Bombay
I have been ill. Srila Prabhupada said bile. He recommended sugar cane juice and bitter sukta and said it was due to overwork.
Srila Prabhupada: They are keeping Balaji as a stone statue and collecting. I am the only single person preaching that Krsna is God. No one appreciates or understands, not even my own disciples. There had been some discussion.
Pancadravida Swami was in to see Srila Prabhupada before his breakfast. He told him that our mission is to make a certain section of the population ideal men. We cannot expect everyone. If by this way or that way you can bring one person to Krsna, He is very pleased to have one of His sons return. Hearing him giving his sannyasi disciple impetus like this to go and preach, I felt again the desire to leave my secretarial duties in direct service of Srila Prabhupada and go preaching in the U.S. colleges. I remember how I was doing that before and vowed that if given the chance, I would try harder this time. But I have already brought this up to Prabhupada and he dismissed it as whimsical. I have my present duties assigned to me. I am trying to chant Hare Krsna and pray to Krsna to treat me as He likes for my betterment, as only He knows. To ask for a certain situation in devotional service is my sense gratification that is not bhakti. The Lord knows my heart and knows all things considered, which I do not know what is best. Bhakti is not for my pleasure, but for Krsna's. I have to have more faith in Krsna that everything is all right.
Walking on Juhu Beach, reading from the Krsna Book about Krsna stealing the clothes of the unmarried gopi girls. Srila Prabhupada said they would do whatever Krsna asked. That is love. You can do whatever You want, still I love You, Lord Caitanya prayed. Otherwise it becomes a business exchange.
As in my miserable case, my spiritual master has clearly asked me to do one duty, but I am thinking of doing another and still pleasing him.
The best thing is even if one doesn't want to do something, if he is ordered by his spiritual master, he should do it. You cannot say that by following the direct order of the spiritual master it will hinder your spiritual progress. Yasya prasadad bhagavat-prasado. By the mercy of the spiritual master, one gets the mercy of Krsna. Without the blessings of the spiritual master, no one can make any advancement. I may think it is very difficult to be asked to suspend traveling and preaching, but if my spiritual master has asked me to do so, then I must.
- From "ISKCON In The 1970s" by HH Satsvarupa dasa Goswami= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
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