From: Bhakti Vikasa Swami

My Dear Srila Prabhupada,
Please accept my humble obeisances at the dust of your lotus feet, which are
the only shelter in the three worlds from the blazing forest fire of
material existence. I sincerely pray to be always working hard in your
divine service, for that is the only pleasure of my life. Please give me the
words to properly glorify you on this holiest of days, your Vyasa-puja.
When I studied different philosophies of religion in college, it was never
an accepted fact that a bona fide saintly person still walked the face of
the earth. When I first saw you in Los Angeles, my speculative theories and
false ideologies were smashed.
I joined your movement in the summer of 1969 in Los Angeles. The devotees in
L.A. were always talking about their spiritual leader. At that time I
thought your name was Pra-buddha.
I remember when you came to the temple in L.A. and paid your dandavats to
Lord Jagannatha and Radha-Krsna. I was immediately impressed by your
humility.
I remember standing outside your door and peeking through the keyhole with
Visnujana dasa.
After services in the temple you would come outside, and all the devotees
would be on their knees waiting for you to touch them on the head.
I can still feel you placing your lotus hand on my head. I thought that I
had never felt such ecstasy in my life.
I had been praying to Lord Krsna that if it were possible, I wanted to
render you some personal service. I had been in charge of temples in
Phoenix, Tucson, Seattle, and Laguna Beach. In 1975 I was in charge of the
Hawaii temple, and I longed to do more personal service for you.
Your servant, Hari-sauri dasa, came to my office and told me you wanted a
cook.
I asked why.
He said you said I was now going to cook your meals.
Krsna had made a transcendental arrangement for me to take over the cooking
duties for you, and I relish that month I was able to serve you personally.
I prayed to Krsna for you to give me some personal words to live by, and
Krsna made that arrangement also.
I was driving you back to the temple one day and asked you, "Prabhupada, you
said that when a tree has flowers it becomes beautiful, and when a woman has
a child she becomes beautiful. When does the disciple become beautiful?"
Because he knew how puffed up I was, Srila Prabhupada immediately chastised
me: "Oh, you have not read our books? What is the meaning of this verse, ar
na koriho mane asa?"
"I don't know, Srila Prabhupada."
"Hmm ... parrotlike chanting."
I felt like jumping out of the car in embarrassment, but it would have been
difficult because I was driving.
Prabhupada, you were so merciful to me that you allowed me to save face.
"What is the meaning of this: yasyaprasadan na gatih kuto 'pi?"
Excitedly I said, "When we get the mercy of the spiritual master, we get the
mercy of Krsna. Without your grace, Srila Prabhupada, I can't make any
spiritual advancement."
"Yes, when the disciple is strictly following the orders of the spiritual
master, then he is beautiful. Otherwise, he is ugly."
Prabhupada, your words burned my heart because I could instantaneously
realize how contaminated my heart was.
Your words and instructions are my life and soul, and I am again praying to
Krsna to burn away any and all desires except one: to be continually engaged
in working hard with body, mind, and soul in your transcendental loving
service.
Please use your transcendental feet to kick me in any way you wish so that I
can stay strongly in your divine service, for that is the only pleasure, the
only treasure, and that is the only beauty in this material world.