"Association is the principle impetus in human life to serve Sri
Hari. Due to the association of non- devotees, one gets material
prosperity. Due to the association of devotees, the spirit soul
gradually becomes absorbed in serving Sri Hari. This is the greatest
shelter for a human being. Never become averse to that. We should
always seek out higher association and understand that association
with materialists will lower the consciousness. Whether we work or
simply go out into the public to preach, we will associate with people
carrying all kinds of contamination and anger towards Krishna. We pick
up some of their consciousness just by being around them. We then have
to shed it by strong chanting, hearing of classes and engaging in
kirtan. All of these activities are part of the cleansing process.
Without these spiritual activities, we will get more absorbed in
material culture. We will start losing our desire to engage in the
devotional process, and start becoming more interested in temporary
pleasures. Srila Bhaktisiddhanta tells us to never become averse to
good association, but we also have to be able to recognize good
association. We cannot buy a good quality diamond if we do not know
what a diamond is. In the process of shopping arond, we will
definitely get cheated. But if we know what we want, we will find a
diamond of the highest quality, and after making the purchase, we will
keep it in very secure place. Similarly, we must know what is good
association. It is association that reminds us of our eternal position
as servitors, increases our appreciation of Vaisnavas, enhances our
love and increases our wonderful appreciaton of Krishna's magnanimity.
It will increase our understanding of our own insignificance as we
attach ourselves to the most significant." Bhakti Tirtha Swami,
Reflections on Sacred Teachings, Vol 5, Srila Bhaktisidddhanta's 64
Principles for Community, Principle 44, page 149-150

--
Yours
Dinesh
Blog:http://dinesh-krsna.blogspot.com

BTS: Examining the quality of our Association By Gopisvari Devi Dasi

"Question: What should one do in a case where the husband has no
desire to take care of his children or his wife, but feels he wants
freedom to pursue sannyasa. He feels family life is attachment and
interferring with his advancement? Answer: Why dont you get a broom
and beat him over the head! He is not an example of detachment;
rather, he is running away from responsibility. In some cases, a
person is detached because they are bored with their old wife and with
their tedious responsibilities. There were cases in which a grhastha
would ask Srila Prabhupada for sannyasa, but he refused them because
he understood the underlying reasons. They used sannyasa as an excuse
to run away from responsibility. In some cases, a husband might act
detached from his wife, but if we look closer, we willl see that he
has strong attachment to other women and other forms of sense
gratification. Obviosly he is not really detached. Detachment does not
just mean detachment from the externals of sense gratification; it
means attachment to the service and worship of Krishna. When that type
of detachment occurs, then the person can offer more to any
relationship. It should not be that a person marries. has two or three
children, and then decides that it is too much responsibility. Our
institution has currently made it more difficult for a person to just
decide that they want to walk out of a relationship to take sannyasa.
If someone wants to take sannyasa but they have children, they have to
make clear and healthy arrangements for the wiffe and children. In the
past some men would pursue the idea of sannyasa without giving any
consideraton to their wife and children. Then the husband would leave,
take sannyasa, and travell all over the world while the family is left
struggling. Then the wife gets angry at the husband and the movement,
and in some cases, even leaves the movement. Renunciation should not
be avoidance of responsibilty. Of course, in some cases a person has a
romantic idea of householder life, and after they enter the asrama,
they find out that it is not quite what they imagined. However they
made a commitment and they should follow through. Some of the best
householders in the movement are those who have learned how to deal
with conflicts and who are completely aware of the illusory aspects of
householder life. The husband and wife have grown to understand each
other, and they understand the need to protect each other and work
together in preaching and service. They are completely devoid of this
idealism that causes the person to go to the other extreme. People who
have a romantic conception of marriage will want a divorce when it
does not unfold according to their own desires." Bhakti Tirtha Swami,
Reflections on Sacred Teachings, Vol 5, Principle 30, Srila
Bhaktisiddhanta's 64 pronciples of Community, page 104

--
Yours
Dinesh
Blog:http://dinesh-krsna.blogspot.com

Marriage & Sannyasa By Gopisvari Devi Dasi

Murals of Krishna Balaram Temple, Vrindavan, UP, India

Even before she could learn to possess, she was asked to share. When
she was barely five, she was asked to make sacrifices for the sake of
her brother who was just two. She was still a kid, but her parents
expected her to play the role of a responsible older sister. Thirty
years later, she has a family to her own; so does her brother. She
still feels responsible for her younger brother. She still advices
him… interferes whenever there are ripples in her brother's marriage,
advices her brother's wife on what to feed the child, and how to
parent the child. She is still making sacrifices, but what is she
getting in return? Heartaches, sleepless night and copious tears over
being treated with indifference. Why? Her brother is old enough to
make his own decisions. Even if some of his decisions go wrong, he
feels they are his learning ground. The sister-in-law regards her as
unwanted interference in her marriage. She believes she should have
the freedom to parents her children the way she wants and detests and
idea of others interfering under the guise of being older to her. From
the first word uttered to the first word written to the first steps he
walked… the father played an active part in it. For the son, his dad
was always a superman, a hero and the only role model he wanted to
emulate. Even the son's career counseling was done by Dad. The son
went on to become a first- generation entrepreneur and again it was
his dad who guided him. Today, the son is a celebrated industrialist.
Even today, the Dad waits up every evening to know what happened at
work, but the son feels claustrophobic. He feels that his dad should
give him more space. Dad is going through spells of depression because
he's not getting the same attention he used to get from his son. Dad
feels that he's not needed anymore. The effect of this is showing up
on his health – he is beginning to age a little faster. You can always
be a sister, but you cannot always play the sister. You will always be
loved as a parent, but you cannot always play the parent. Beyond a
point, not everybody can accept a holier-than-thou' approach. A
three-year-old expects to be respected in a certain way and the three-
year-old needs to be respected that way. At three, not being given the
choice of clothes she wants to wear is interpreted by her as not being
respected. At ten, the son wants to read the menu card by himself and
place the order. That to him is his idea of being respected. As a
teenager, she wants to choose her friends; and her parents respecting
her choice of friends is her sense of being respected. Now that he has
worked with you for a few years, he wants to take a few decisions by
himself, and your not overruling his decisions is his sense of being
respected. Every age and every phase of life has some sense of respect
associated with it, and you need to respect that. Through the
intentions may be noble, sometimes our attempt to guide people,
especially unasked for, makes them feel not respected. The need to be
respected is far greater then the need to be guided. Make others feel
respected… let this be your choice. They will take your guidance… let
this be their choice. To live is to live fearlessly. When you have
nothing to hide, you have nothing to avoid. True freedom is found only
in transparent living. The greatest compliment one can give oneself is
to declare, "I am an open book."

--
Yours
Dinesh
Blog:http://dinesh-krsna.blogspot.com

The Need To Be Respected Is Far Greater Than The Need To Be Guided !!! By Rohan Shanti Shukla

Iron age of addiction,Knowledge of Sankhya-Bhakti Yoga